Housewife in Hollywood - housewifeinhollywood.com

Not only do I have to ponder what to get my dad on Father’s Day but I have to think about what to get for my husband. These are two separate tasks. My dad is fairly simple when it comes to gifts. I could get him a salami-cheese box, a 6 pack of MGD, cigars, a new shirt for summer, a trip to a steakhouse. I could probably even get away with a big hug and a homemade card.
Getting something for Mr. HIH is tricky.

He already has most of the things he loves like video games, movies on Blu-Ray, and upgrades to computer devices. So instead of finding favorite things to gift wrap it’s time to get creative. I’m not talking homemade gift cards I’m talking creative thinking.

The gift I’ll give Mr. HIH is the Silent Treatment. Here’s how to give your husband the Silent Treatment so he’ll really appreciate it.

The night before you should find out what he wants to do on Father’s Day. Maybe he wants to have a nice lunch out with the family or take the kids to the park. If that is the answer then the Silent Treatment option isn’t for you. If he’s like my hubby he probably said something like, “I don’t know. Maybe play video games. Watch a movie, relax.”

Perfect!

First off bring him some coffee, tea or whatever hot beverage he likes in the morning with a subtle yet seductive kiss. Then just leave the room and don’t come back. That’s right don’t come back for the morning conversation. Do not come back to ask about the bills, the trash cans, the sprinklers, the next family event that your mother-in-law emailed you about. Do not come back just wait for him to come out for breakfast.

Keeping yourself busy is key to the Silent Treatment gift. This way he won’t think you’re pissed at him and you won’t break down and start nagging about that closet door that falls off the hinges.

Next, make yourself scarce for most of the day. Take the kiddos and let dad have the house for awhile because peace and quiet in a house is a very special gift indeed.

Alright, so you’re back from the outing and Dad’s still in his underwear dancing around the sofa… oh wait that was the retro movie Risky Business. He might be busy watching a movie, playing a video game, tinkering around the garage, sleeping or eating leftover pizza.

Now’s the time to just let him be, go about your day as if he isn’t even there. This might sound harsh but it’s a great gift.

Don’t ask questions while he’s playing the video game. Don’t add to the Honey-Do list. Don’t complain about your hair, your toe nails, the living room, your recent weight gain. Don’t send the kiddos in for information like what he wants for dinner. Just let the guy relax.

So that’s the Silent Treatment. It’s not for every husband on Father’s Day but if you have one like mine he’ll have one of the happiest days of the year.

As always, remember to click the highlighted text for the full HIH effect.

I’m off on vacation this week celebrating Father’s Day with my dad in his hometown of Richmond, Illinois. Richmond is a little over an hour away from Chicago so we’ll be doing some sightseeing Ferris Bueller style.

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off is a John Hughes film from 1986. It became an 80′s cult classic full of fun quotes and memorable scenes. People of all ages have been spotted wearing their Save Ferris shirts.

How many times have you used the, “Anyone? Anyone?” line in the last few years? Or is that just me?

Many of the scenes were shot in Chicago so I think it would be fun to do a Ferris Bueller’s Day Off tour by frequenting some of the same places they went in the movie. Click here to view the trailer.

Matthew Broderick has grown up quite a bit since the 80’s. Here he is talking with David Letterman about going to the dentist, and expecting twins with his wife Sarah Jessica Parker.

Speaking of Father’s Day, Matthew Broderick guest stars as the voice of Max in a special Father’s Day episode of CYBERCHASE premiering June 19, 2009 on PBS Kids.

I’ll be back soon. Meanwhile you can always peruse the archives for HIH retro reruns.
Happy Father’s Day to all you Cyber Dads of the Year! You know who you are. Anyone? Anyone?